Potential woman on the lose – Take cover!

21 Nov

Today, I said goodbye to my week long guest, sigh! They are still at the airport and I miss them terribly! What is this girl to do? Suck it up basically.

I have come to realized that even thought I love to live by myself, I do crave human interaction, I think it was due to all of those years living at home and having my family around me. Yes, I left home in my late twenties – gulp! horror of horror! I know my American friends are like shaking their heads and wondering why it took me so long to fly the coop. While my Latin and European friends are shaking their heads with full understanding as to why. (But, that is material for another post down the line).

Sooo, anyway…

The fact remains that I’m going to go home tonight and there will be the customary greeting by the stray cats… but instead of opening the door and begin greeted by 2 great human beings, I will enter a silent house, with only the meow of my 2 inside cats (yes, I support 4 cats). And all I can say is that it will suck B-I-G TIME. I will likely take the time to do laundry, which has been piling up… Watch a bunch of TV, since my TIVO list is about to burst at the seams or just send everything to hell and go to bed early with a good book, which are also starting to pile up on my nightstand – can you guys see a pattern here? Having 3 jobs is just no fun. I have come to the point where I have no clue what day it is and where I’m suppose to be – a bad, bad sign. The only good thing is that there is a lot of underground moving and if it works out, I can drop one of those jobs and it will be the retail one, since its just awful. I mean I worked in retail when I was in High School (not even in college!) and they treated you like cattle – cheap labor (bad pay), hard labor (long hours) and inconsiderate treatment (I don’t even want to go into that or I will really quit!), its nice to know that NOTHING has change in that line of work for over 20 years.

On the dating front: COLD… actually its FROZEN, very FROZEN. I have come to the realization that moving away from RUYN hit me below the belt and that took me by completely surprise, (clueless me!) I thought I was being very straight shooter; well the joke is on me folks.

And how did I come to this enlightenment? Easy… I spoke with him last week and as soon as he started talking about the girl that he liked (yes, he seems to have found “the” one), it hit me like a ton of bricks… unlike the other conversations we had about his other dates, I knew this one was special and he really liked her, so I knew I could not sit there and listen to him gushing (yes he was) and praising her. I just did not have the stomach for it. So much so, that now I pretty sure (ok, about 80% sure) that I’m going to completely cut ties with him, it just hurts too much. I thought it would be only me, but today I put it to the test and invited him to dinner at the house and he kindly declined saying that he just did not feel comfortable going. Snuff said! Moving on, moving on.

Greek guy is still on the table. He is in the process of moving and super busy at work, so we have settled by sending emails back and forth and promising each other that we will call and set up another meeting as soon as our lives slow down a bit. So, I have him under “keep warm” in the oven of dating life.

But I have taken a look and maybe it is time to take a break from dating. I mean, I have been in match.com for over 2 months now; my profile has been looked at 1000+ times. I have sent over 40-50 emails (not even winks, people, but E-mails!) to guys that sounded nice and normal and I have yet to find a big bite in this pool. Ok, maybe I’m being a bit picky, but you know what… I settled in my last relationship and I know that I cannot do it again. I know what I can bring to a relationship and damn it, I’m freaking worth it. (Do I sound a bit conceited? You bet your ass!). So having said that, I’m going to pull up my feet and throw the towel for a bit and work on myself for little while. I seem to have lost myself and I need to balance myself out a little.

Because if not, then I will totally lose it. And there is nothing worth than a woman on the lose – trust me on this.

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