Dreaming of love, falling in love, tripping on love, being in love, staying in love, adhering to love, succumbing to love!

2 Feb

Today, as MG was leaving to go to work, I walked him to the door, and stood there as he was opening the gate, he then turned around and told me “you have a good day baby” and he looked at me and smile, a great smile, open, full of laughter and at that moment, it hit me… deep down, hard and fast… I love him! It took my breath away; I actually took a step back. I saw him turn back around and walk away. At that moment I wanted to shout … “Wait!” And run to him and cling to him and just feel him closer and whisper my secret, actually shout it out – loud and clear, for everyone to hear it.

Yeah, crazy woman on the loose! I don’t see my neighbors appreciating the shouting.

But, I did not such thing (dignity people, dignity won out).

Instead, I stood there on the open doorway, letting the feeling just wash over me. Oh my god, OH MY GOD… I’m in love! Honest to goodness, I-will-do-anything-for-him-love. Like, I will eat liver if he asked… ahhh no, ok, not that… but, you know where I’m getting at. He is my ideal mate, I love that he is understanding, very patient, brave, mature, supportive, caring, honest, affectionate, compassionate, sincere, protective yet not possessive, intelligent, passionate, faithful, good looking, very funny and can cook!

So, now that is out there, I have not a clue what to do with this new found information/feelings:

Do I tell him?
Do I tell my best friend?
Do I tell the cats?
Do I keep my mouth shut and wait for him to say it first?
Do I say it first?

Am I over thinking it? Yes I am!

We have been dating for 43 days. He calls when he says he’ll call. He shows up when he says he’ll show up. My friends like him, and he’s nice to the cats – hell my cats like him better than me!. He’s doing everything right, and I know he’s everything I ever wanted in a man. Every time he does something right, I fall for him a little more. I’m scared because he holds my heart in his hands!

Today after I made this bit of a discovery with my feelings, I realize that a part of me is terrified that suddenly it’ll end: He’ll stop calling. He’ll meet somebody else. I will discover his dresser drawers are crammed with women’s underwear.

Let’s face it. Falling in love is not for cowards. It takes strength, confidence, and poise.

And I’m no coward.

So…

Do I tell him?
Do I tell my best friend?
Do I tell the cats?
Do I keep my mouth shut and wait for him to say it first?
Do I say it first?

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