Part Deux…

27 Jul

While I was with Dimple guy in the twilight zone of the B&N… my cell phone rang like it never rang before. I’m not very popular; my cell may ring 1 or 2 times a day, (that is why I can get away with the cheapest plan from T-Mobile) not because my friends do not call me, but because I’m not a phone talker – I hate talking on that thing, period and my friends know it.

But back to the point…

while I was sitting there thinking of ways to get out of the date, my phone received a total of 9 calls – Shit, was I the belle of the ball or what? 2 calls were from the sis, 2 from the “x”, 3 from the diver (more on him later) 1 text messages from the Italian, 1 message from Support girl (she is in a mental state right now) and 1 from New Guy (remember him?) Even Dimple guy said something (the only conversation he started without my help, now that I think about it!).

So of course I soon as I bailed out of the date, I was dialing the voice mail… My “x” wanted to know if I was alive and well (barely!) The sis, was telling me she was skipping kickball, Support girl wanted me to support her in her man drama, New Guy was asking if we were going to get together this week and then the Diver was the cherry on top… with this bit of a classic voice message…

But a bit of background, since we left him off here… this has happen:

Tuesday, (3 days after his crash) he called me up to tell me he wanted to have lunch on Weds (the next day), since I wanted to talk to him face to face and basically call it off, I agree – we left it as he will be calling me the next day with the time and place.

Weds: came and went – no call from Diver
Thursday: came and went – no call from Diver

Friday: at 3pm call from Diver. And it went something like this:

Diver: Hellooo, hellooo (in singing voice – I shit you not) beautiful!

Me: Hey… btw, if you are calling for that lunch, sorry you are late

Diver: Oh, yeah… I’m so sorry, I got complicated with clients and needed to drive to [T town]… and I did not have a signal between [my town and the T town]. (are you kidding me???)

Me: uh? Well, you did have signal in the [T town] right?

Diver: Yes

Me: Then you should have called and told me that you were not going to make lunch that we had agreed on – would have been greatly appreciated, you know it’s called “courtesy”.

Diver: I’m so sorry, you are right, I just got complicated, but let me make it up to you and take you to dinner tonight

Me: sorry, got plans

Diver: have a hot date tonight?

Me: got plans (let him wonder)

Diver: How about tomorrow?

Me: Sure we could do a late lunch (I had the brunch date with IT guy – and yes, I was agreeing to lunch, even though he did not deserved it, but .. I was still stocked in getting rid of him face to face – for my own personal satisfaction damn it).

Diver: I have to be in [name of town] but I will be back by Noon, late lunch?

Me: Sure call me when you get back in town and I will meet you for lunch

Diver: Ok, talk to you tomorrow.

Me: Sure, “click”

Saturday: came and went – no call from Diver
Sunday: came and went – no call from Diver
Monday: came and went – no call from Diver

Tuesday: 3 calls, 1 voice message from diver that went like this:

“Hello, Monica, this is Diver guy… I just called a bit ago and first thought I got disconnected, then called back and got hung up at (I sent him to voice mail) then called again and got hung up at again (sent him to voice mail again), so I think I get your message loud and clear, figure we had a good thing going (come again clueless!) but I guess not, I believe in having good communication (you wish!) and I’m old school, so I would have appreciated a heads up that you were no longer interested (yeah, I would have appreciated a CALL 3 frigging days ago too!) but, I do want to tell you that you are a sweet girl and hope that you find what you are looking for, since I’m not.. And I wish you the very best and if you ever want to call me back you have my number.”

Yep! Unbelievable… close those mouths. And since I’m just NOT about to let that one fly… I dial his ass right up and this is what went down:

Diver: Hello

Me: Diver, is me Monica

Diver: Hi

Me: Yeah, hi, listen I just finished listening your voice mail and I would like to take the time to clarify some points with you, do you have time (I called him and he was at work – and my mama taught me to be polite, even when putting someone’s ass on a platter).

Diver: Sure

Me: First, I did not hang up on you, I was in a place were I could not take your call and sent you to voice mail. I don’t need to hang up on people, if I DID NOT WANT TO TALK TO YOU, I would have told you straight up. Second, on the communication and the “heads up”, I still waiting on that phone call for our Saturday lunch date – so I don’t think you have the cards to play the house with that hand. Like you I’m old school too and I was taught to return phone calls when it was originally agreed upon.

Diver: yes, I need to apologize for that (you think???) I had to leave on a last minute business trip that Saturday and everything happen fast and I did not have time to call you.

Me: Well diver, that would have been a great excuse if we would have been in the 1800’s when you would have needed to send the pony express with your delayed message, but since we are in the twentieth-first century and you have communication at your finger tips, or better yet, strapped to your ass, all it would have taken was 3 min to flip that phone up, dial and tell me that you got called out of town, and would NOT be making the pre-planned lunch date and that you will get back to me when you were back in town this week.

Diver: (Silence)

Me: Yeah, old school bud.

Diver: Well you know I been working on these deals and they are time consumming. (yes, he used that shit up too!)

Me: Umm, but, see the problem is not the cancellation or that you even work long and unusual hours.. that is NOT the issue here, the issue is that on your voice mail you said that you wanted the heads up if I was not interested. And I wanted to make sure you understand that it has not been me that has fallen on his duties to maintain the communication line open. I have been more than willing and open to seeing you again, and to work your schedule. You on the other hand have fallen short and not in a polite, considerate way. So, I’m keeping those communication lines open right now and informing you that I’m no longer interested in having anything to do with you.

Diver: Well, you made yourself pretty clear.

Me: Crystal, so there is no mis-understanding.

Diver: Ok then

Me: Ok then, bye… (click).

Part 3… will be forthcoming, again it does not stop there.


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