Sweet Picture

25 Oct

I recently read that falling in love takes place when you’re not even around that person. ahhh yeah… I was like: The hell?

But the more I thought about it, the more it made sense. The BF and I have hit the 4-month mark in our relationship and as I looked back I can see how the statement above makes sense…

I mean when you meet someone new you spent some time with that person and then you go home and you picture that person in your head right? And then maybe you think about yourself in all sorts of situations with this person, having fun, and enjoying the feelings and things you like to enjoy with them.

And then maybe (as time progresses) you start to list all of the qualities about him you really like (more on this later).

Then you get this feeling in the pit of your stomach that just starts to spread out and lets you know that you really like this person. Butterflies anyone?

And then you start saying his name out loud, you start bringing it up in conversations with your friends, family and anyone that is there to listen (driving them bat-shit crazy), and maybe you even dance around the house singing it in a kind of a dorky way, right? (guilty! )

I think everything, including falling in love, is a process. And when you do that process with someone and really let it happen, that’s when that feeling (the real one) takes over, the feeling you’re really looking for, the one that stays with you all the time every time you are around each other, even in the most stressful times.

According to Italian girl… I’m over-the-hills- in L.O.V.E with the BF.

I still don’t think so… I do know that I absolutely love the idea of falling in love. I love my independent nature and I’m the kind that needs to feel a bit more at liberty than some, so I always regarded falling in love as depending on someone for your personal happiness (wrong!) and during that process losing a bit of my independence, so I tend to really hold fast to my feelings and not let them get the better of me (the last time I did that, with the “X”, it was major road-kill all over the place, and I learn from past mistake – the hard way, the hard way, of course)… but, I may have to give her [Italian girl] some (SOME!) credit on that assumption because, right now, it’s all about this kind of passion:

I’m passionate about being with BF and/or around him all the time (this, believe me is a shocker even for me!). I adore that he is thinking of me 24/7 (my mother always told me: “Monica, find someone that is always more in love/like/lust with you than you are of them – it will make thing so much easier in the long run” ) I wonder if there was a catch to that, and I think I now understand what she was trying to tell me – Thanks Mom!

I really like that he worries about me – he called me last week like 10 times a day to check up on me and make sure I was not dying alone from the nasty cold I caught. He reminds me to take my vitamins, to take care of myself, to make sure I don’t miss the doctor appointments. For some, it may sound like he is being controlling, for me it it means that he is truly concerned and that makes me hot. (Yeah, I KNOW!)

and talking about hot…

I do find him irresistible, he is not George Clooney looking (he is easy on the eyes), but I guess he is MY George Clooney and that is enough to want me to rip his clothes off and jump his bone every chance I get. (Ok… maybe this is too much information for some – but, it’s my blog – so DEAL)

I fancy that he has a good relationship with his family. Knowing how important the “Duo” is in my life, I know that he understand the meaning of “Family will always come first” so when he is experiencing my crazy family moments, (like last weekend) he fully understands that its part of me and he cannot change that, no matter how hard he tries is just not going to happen – the crazy family comes with me, take it or leave it. (He is taking it. – Sweet!)

I have a weakness (in the kind that melts my heart) when I experience his quiet, steady determination. Most of the time he does not have much to say, but he listens and when he does [speak up], he means it and it really pushes all of my button (the good ones) because, I have found in him, a person that will walk the talk. (I had way to many wimpy people around me of late.)

I like that he does not overstep bounds and gives me the space that I need to feel a steady balance in my life, which I need in order to feel in control of my somewhat delusional life.

So I guess, after what is said and done, I may be slowly and surely falling in love?

All the signs are pointing towards that road and I know that I do miss him constantly (ours is a LDR now) and that all I want to do is have him by my side. Do I sound clingy and needy? Maybe I do, but I love (yes L.O.V.E.) the feelings that are running around in me. For the first time (in a very long time) I have a sense of purpose and goal when it comes to my personal life. Its like a very big puzzle that is finally coming together to show me the big picture.

And what a sweet picture it is turning out to be.

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