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The one where I find out actual people do read this blog and they are my “FANS” and that sunshine is more important that blogger’s block.

26 Mar

The other day as I was lying in bed nursing a bad back, I got a tweet from a follower that went something like this:

“@eusmaca Hey… why aren’t you blogging? Your fans miss you! Hope everything is okey with you, the man, the dog, etc.”

I almost fell of the bed!

My first thought?


As in real people?

My second thought?


My third thought?

It has not been that long since I posted… has it?

I went online and there it was my last post was a month ago. A MONTH! Jesus a full month since I posted!

What the hell have I been doing?

And I thought back and realized that apparently I had taken a bit of a “break” from blogging.  Because March has been a supper busy month in our house.

The month started with entertaining out of town family, followed by a spike of work load. And let’s not forget the on-going saga of looking for a new place to live.

You know all the normal stuff. And while it seems that everything I been doing may be “blogable” material, when I would sit in front of the computer, I would get huge amounts of bloggers block.  There I sat staring blankly at the screen unable to string a sentence together for hours on end. And somewhere in my subconscious I must have heard a whisper “if you have nothing to say – it’s probably best to say nothing at all”

Did I just quote an Air Supply song?

So, since you all know I love list… lets recap in bullet point format

  • We were surprised to learn that in a couple of months we will be buying baby stuff and no it’s NOT FOR US. But, for Tom’s brother’s who announce that arrival of a niece or nephew for Tom this coming fall. We are all excited about this. I have to say that I’m a bit jealous (in a good way). Tom has made sure we have extra protection during this phase, because according to him “it can spread like wildfire” – I have no clue what he is talking about.
  • Our house hunting continues and it’s kicking our butt. Supply and demand on rental property in our area sucks. Everything is too small, too expensive and to ugly. Yes, we are picky people – we are not apologizing for it either. I know there is that perfect house out there for us – I feel it. But, it’s just driving me bat-shit that it’s not going according to my schedule. Yes, I know, I need to chill the hell up.
  • I’m happy to report that I have obtain fans over at my food blog as well (yes, I’m plugging the other blog here) and my photography has been so well received, that is has given me a huge boost in my confident. Which has got me to seriously think that is about time to switch careers at this point of my life. I just need to hold on to my security blanket a bit more before taking the jump.
  • But in order to do that jump I have joined numerous groups who like to meet and discuss everything there is to know about food, marketing, photography, business and all that jazz. My weekends are not my OWN anymore.
  • And talking about career changes…Tom has started a new job. One that makes him feel so much better about what he does in a daily basis. With the extra benefit of better pay.
  • And since the fans are asking: The balls-less dog, is just doing fine thankyouverymuch. He is not missing anything that was there before and he continues to be his big goofy self. Tom, still gives him sorry looks.

So there you have my fans, it has been a busy month, one filled with great news, new possibilities, new undertakings and lots of playtime because it seems that spring has kicked the winter back on its sorry ass and the weather has been incredible the last couple of weeks. Which, has enticed us to be outside more, soaking up the sunshine that was missed for the last couple of months.

And I’m sorry to say, that is more important than me sitting staring blankly at the screen unable to string a sentence together for hours on end.

But, thank you for caring and checking up on me. Once in a while I still need a good kick in the butt to remind me that I have fans!  Wow, fans.


My rock, my home, my heart and everything in between

25 Feb

Back on February 25th, 08′ I wrote this on a post:

“…Going on a date, not expecting anything, actually dreading it, since I was not on the mood for it, and having it turn into a 5 hour date, full of great conversation, lots of laughs, and the best looking hazel eyes I seen on a man yet.”

2 Days later I wrote this:

“Last night I went out on a date, with a man that does not fit the mold for my idea of a partner. And as I sat finding fault with everything in front of me, I felt that same light bulb moment that I did 5 years ago. I mentally shouted out “F*** it” and started to see everything that was right about him. Rather than give in to the fight-or-flight response that comes from my instinct to have the right person, in my mold, I suddenly found myself wanting the challenge of finding someone new, different than me, who can teach me new ways to evolve into a higher, more beautiful expressions of myself, realizing, embracing, and celebrating the beauty of having someone that may offer me not such a boring life.”

And for the past 2 years, I have been challenged in spades.

Today, Tom and I are celebrating our 730th day together as a couple. SEVEN HUNDRED AND THIRTY!


That sounds like a lot, doesn’t it?

And those seven hundred and thirty days have been filled with laugher, tears, major freaked outs (mostly by me), 2 moves, lost of a parent, lost of a job (twice!), various trips by plane, by car. Holidays, Birthdays, minor freaked out’s (mostly by me) and everything else in between.

We have learned when to give each other space, when to pull each others weight, when to created united fronts and when to know to let each of us battle their own battles.

Our respect for each other has grown and multiplied. We have learned to trust and valued each others actions. Question our thoughts and share our ideas and dreams. We have fallen more in love (yeah sappy right?) with each other than ever.

He has taught me to be confident in reaching higher and be bolder in my every day choices because he will always be there to catch me no matter what.

He is the person I want to see all the time, be around all the time. The opinions that matter the most. He is the father I want for my children. He is the man I want to reach out to when I’m old and grey and in need of a hand.

He is my rock, my home, my heart and everything in between.

So, baby, here is to us. We made it this far, and I’m not afraid anymore to make it farther still.

Couplehood... still learning to navigate

Coveting a Dyson, and Cheese puff more than ever

22 Feb

Today marks the 9th day that I have not slept in my own bed. No, I have not moved out, simply put I been pet sitting a shit load of peoples dogs.

We need the extra “mula” and while I’m so grateful that I can do this (easy job) to get it, I miss my house, my bed and of course Tom. Not necessary in that order.

But, this week marks what I’m going to call the family-galorethon. Because Tom’s family has decided to leave their cold abode and head down to bask in our forty-degree weather. So, for the next 2 weeks we have 2 sets of family branches in our mist.

And I’m not complaining, because I love his family. I have come to adore them as I adore Tom. They are funny, gracious and have embraced me fully into their fold. And of course family duty calls – numerous get-togethers, dinners, outings and I would be the first one to enjoy all this activities except that adding that to the mix of someone that has not been sleeping in her own bed for the past 9 days can be a bit overwhelming.

In order words: I have freaked the hell up a couple of times in the last 3 days.

And poor Tom has paid the price. And since we need to put a spin on it, I have decided to morph into super woman and invite the family to not one dinner, not two, but three.

Because, I apparently love to walk on the wild side in order to push my limits.

Or we can also see Tom’s version which is “You are PLAIN CRAZY!”

So of course, as I write this, the mental list is growing by the second. Menus need to be set! Supermarket trips need to be scheduled! Cleaning patrol needs to be assigned! And just now I realized that I may have bitten more that I can chew on this one.

Because as I’m writing this post, all these random thoughts are popping up all over the place:

OMG, I don’t have 98% of the ingredients of the chosen menus
Shit, we still have not found the replacements rugs for the dinning room and the kitchen.
Which means we need to find time to visit stores around town and hope for the best.
When in the hell would I have time to go to the 4 different supermarkets?
I have rugs to purchase!
Damn it, we have to find the replacement filter for the vacuum cleaner.
When, can I fit THAT IN?
God, I wish we have a Dyson, this would be so much easier.
Why is the BFF beating me at Words with Friends?
Oh, wait, that is for ANOTHER post.
Do we have enough tables to sit all of those people up?
Crap! No, we do not. Add call the rental people to the list!
Is it 4pm already?
Damn it! No.its.not.
Why am I hooked on the Olympic curling game? It does not make sense, it’s a boring game!
I’m craving cheese puffs so badly right now.
Jesus, I forgot there are 2 vegetarians in the family, what the hell do I cook for them?
How in the hell would owing a Dyson make things easier?
I can’t remember if the vending machine sells cheese puffs.
I really don’t feel like going all the way to the other building to find out.
I need to relax the hell up.
Where is that rental people phone number??
Is it 4pm already?
Damn it! No.its.not.

A bit overwhelm may not be the right word at this point.

And Tom my be right, “Plain Crazy” may fit better

Bye Bye 2009, don’t let the door hit you on the way out!

31 Dec

Today you will probably get tired of ready post after post about 2009 and everyone’s personal  take on it. For some it will be a great year (Babies! Engagements! Marriage!) for some it would have been a challenging year (Layoffs! New Jobs! Health problems!) and for hollywood a terrible year of death (Michael Jackson! Farrah Fawcett! Ted Kennedy! Britney Murphy! and many, many others).

Looking back on it, I have to categorized it as a mix of a great  with some challenges and in some cases total crap.

It started not so well, Tom got laid off work not once but twice! Then found a job, not a GREAT job but a good job that paid the bills.  I on the other hand was saved from a huge laid off wave at work, lost my favorite boss and got not one, but 3 new bosses and a pile of work on top of it.

We enjoyed a great trip to North Carolina not once but twice

We decided to move to a new home (the good!) and while it has created a few financial burdens, on the personal front we are way happier here than his previous home.  Its ours, we found it together, we moved in together, we decorated it together, it was us.

We had a bit of health issues, specifically me. And a couple of trips to the closest ER.

I got into new stuff that made me feel more creative and grateful for  new projects that will keep me out of trouble.

We both found our holiday spirit this year

But at the end of it all, 2009 and has showed me that no matter what, when it gets tough, I can still count on friends:

I know she needs to put that away!

count on family:

Strike a pose!
My soon to be in-law family

and most of all I can count on him:

Yeah, look bored baby

So, yes 2009 has been a good year, a challenged year and in some cases a shit year. And  I’m happy to see it go right out the door, never to return.

We are ready for 2010 to come and give us all it go, because we are ready to kick butt right back.

Happy New Year to all!

It has been a bumpy ride with moments of total roller-coaster riding

21 Dec

Do you know what this is?  

Trying it on for size

 It’s now my official age for the next 365 days.. YIKES!  

Yesterday I celebrated my 41st birthday.  I’m still raddled a bit that I’m FORTY-ONE YEARS OLD… where in the hell has the time gone? Because, I don’t remember living FORTY-ONE years.  All I remember is that it has been a bumpy ride with moments of total roller-coaster riding.But, it’s there, it all is glory… and I’m planning on trying it on and seeing if my forty-one will treat me better than my forty did.

In order to maximize the day, the NYBoys and BFF took to the sky full of snowstorms, and mini-hurricane wings and dropped in my backyard to eat, drink and be merry (very merry!) for 3 whole days.

I spent the better part of the week preparing for their visit as well as prepping my house and cooking up a storm to feed 12 hungry grown adults on Saturday night.  I decided since it was my birthday I was going to go all out and take out the china, and use the nice silverware and dress up the table with a centerpiece and all the jazz that goes along – I was going to Martha Stewart my guest to death!

After numerous ideas and revisions we decided on simple, and earthy-looking… And with the help of Tom and BFF and various editing and discussions, the creative juices started flowing, and we ended up with this as our dinner table:

Simple, Clean lines and lovely

I was totally in love with it.  And everyone else did too – score one!

And the food! oh boy the food. Cooking up for 3 days straight paid off! My mother was kind enough to make her pork stew, and let me tell you it’s out of this world, and the weather could not have cooperated more, since that night it was nice and cold outside, perfect weather for that hearty menu I had come up with.

This year, I also decided not to have cake, I wanted something to remind me of my younger years and I choose my favorite dessert: Zuppa Inglesa, which is basically a trifle made with chocolate and vanilla cream in between layers of sponge cake soaked in run. And yes, it taste as divine as it sounds.

After much eating and major discussions, the evening ended with everyone agreeing that it be a hoot appropiate to have me sit and open presents. And after much pulling, and ripping I found gift cards! Flower arrangements! Jewelry, and the best surprise of all? A brand new Sony Cyber-Shot Digital Camera.  And that present alone made a believer in me that wish list are the best invention by man since the calculator.

So there you go, another birthday down the hatchet and this one was the best one yet, because nothing beats having your friends and family remind you that you are FORTY-ONE YEARS OLD.


This past week needs only two words to describe itself.

18 Dec

So today the first of many people will be coming through our house during this coming birthday weekend bash.

First up is the BFF, who arrives today, god willing on time, because that girl has an ongoing jinx with the travel industry… every time she has to be somewhere there is a delay. And no I just did not jinx her, she does that all on her own.

True to form, today we woke up to heavy rains and looking at the weather, she is getting most of it on her side of the state, so AA, yes I’m looking at you, you better be ON TIME on your flight over tonight, because seriously, IT’S MY BIRTHDAY WEEKEND and you CAN’T TOUCH THAT!

Then tomorrow we have the NYBoys who will be HOPEFULLY arriving in the afternoon. And I say hopefully, because as I was writing this, I received an email giving me an update that NYC woke up to 16 degrees (DAMN IT’S COLD!) and an expected snowstorm is due to descend on their asses tomorrow. Which can mean the inevitable: they may be delayed as well.

And this folks is the reason that most of the time I curse myself for being born in December! Because, December is just INSANE.

Anyone want to disagree with me there? Yeah? No? Aha! Did not think so.

And so with the impending visits, it all boils down to a furry of activity prepping the house.  Apparently I have entered a contest called “Who can be the best host”, and hell if I’m not going to win it. (Of course all of this happens in my internal mind – which TOTALLY COUNTS!). But back to the house, we (because Tom got sucked into this madness as well) have steamed clean all of the floor carpets (not JUST vacuum, oh no, but STEAMED), bed duvets have been aired out, rooms have been scrubbed, bathrooms totally bleached out. All towels, bed lines have been laundered and iron out (I don’t even iron my work clothes!) and while I was on it, why not re-organized the linen closet – yeah, WHY THE HELL NOT!

For most folks that would be the end of that.

For me? No so fast.

Because, my inner type-A personality made an appearance (during the crazy) and whispered that more needed to be done. So, I jumped and started to make a make a list – because you guys know how much I LOVE A LIST… and now the following task have been placed on Tom’s side of the list: Change A/C filter, Hang new lamps in kitchen, Mow the lawn. And a couple of more things are in there, but to write them all, is confirming that I’m a total freak.


And for those (like the very little male readership that I have on this blog) wondering if Tom’s list if THAT full, what’s on my side of the list? Well I tell you. It’s mostly cooking dips and tarts and tantalizing appetizers. As well as desserts, side dishes and anything else I think 12 people will need to feel welcome and well feed. In addition to all the cooking frenzy, let’s not forget the buying of flowers and strings and stock paper and ironing napkins and tablecloths and making sure that Tom does not kill me in the process.  So you see I have MORE on my side of the list.

But you know what has happen during my full-on birthday-planning dervish frenzy?

I have completely forgotten that I will be turning FORTY-ONE years old in less than 72 hours!

And there are only two words to that realization: HOLY.SHIT!


An ER moment, except George Clooney was not there to save me. Instead my boyfriend showed up and showed me he can kick ass.

7 Dec

I been gone for a bit, but I have a perfectly good excuse.

I been super sick, because well, I brought back SOMETHING from NC, and that something was not saltwater Taffy or Smoky Mountain Snack Mix, or even Chocobilly Cookies.

No, sir, NC awarded me with a nice cold, one full of complimentary coughs, and chills and runny nose and oh, let’s not forget the splitting headaches due to congestion.

So after a 12 hour drive back to Florida on Sunday, I was out for the count and put my ass down in bed, under the covers, holding the Klennex box and my Teraflu bottle for dear life.  Because, people I WAS GOING TO DIE – the end.

By Tuesday, I had enough and I knew I needed to step up the game.  So I called my doctors office, did major begging and got myself an appoitment to which I then dragged myself to and proceeded  to DIE THERE so they could give me enough drugs to forget my impending fate.  After an hour wait and having my nose, ears, and throat checked, the good doctor gave me the a-okey and wrote me a prescription for antibiotics and strong cough medicine (I had graduated to the big league people!).

I dragged my ass back home and took the first two pills of the antibiotic and then waited until it was dark outside in order to drink up the HEAVY-DUTY cough medicine and finally fall asleep and dream of rainbows and unicorns while BREATHING THROUGH MY NOSE, like a normal person.

Except we hit a itzy-bitsy snag.

After 20 minutes of drinking up and waiting to go off to la-la-land… I started to feel a bit of discomfort, as in pain below my breast bones and this would have been fine except that in less than a minute it tuned into a oh-my-fucking-gawd-will-someone-please-stab-me-in-the-eye-with-a-pencil-to-distract-me-from-the-pain from hell.

And folks, I’m really good about my pain threshold and have a very high pain tolerance, I can hold onto A LOT of pain before I fall and cry like a baby waiting my mommy, or take narcotics.

But, in this case it happen way faster, because as soon as I started having trouble breathing, as in gulping huge amounts of air and nothing, and I mean NOTHING was getting through I knew I had reached the unsurvivable hell in pain-time. And there was nothing I could do about it.

Anyway, on pain scale from 1-to-childbirth (which I have yet to experience but, I have plenty of reference points from friends and mommyblogs), this was about a 9.5 and climbing fast, because this was not one of those that you can “breathe through”, but those that you can only recall later as blurry, red-tinged moments of sweating-panting-teeth-grinding waves of oh-my-baby jesus-pain punctuated by increasingly shorter periods of blessed respite – except there was no intermission followed by liquor and tiny hors d’oeuver.

Where was I? Oh yeah, in agonizing pain so debilitating that I could barely unfurl from the fetal position.  It was time for the big guns: so I shouted out to Tom to come and save me.

Except it was more like a baby whimper, because yeah, I could not even come up for air to scream that I was DYING DAMN IT! and that I was wearing underwear with a hole and that’s how I was going to end up in the coroner office, totally embarrassing. (note to self: I need to stop watching so many CSI’s)

I was taking a shit worried

Tom, thank god hears things and when he shouted back if I was ok and never got a confirmation ran to my side (The good, good man – he gets so many brownie points its bananas!) to investigate and instead of finding me all nice and drugged out-of-my-mind, he found me doubled-over, whimpering, quivering mass of hell, holding to dear life unto the floor and taking big, gulps of breath with a crazy look (at least that is how he describe me later on. I was to busy trying to NOT DIED to notice this tiny detail, plus, truth be told, I was way more worry about the hole in my underwear than I care to admit).

Anyway back to the saga story.

Tom, decided at that moment to play Columbo and start to interrogate the shit out of me, while I’m trying to respond and breathe at the same time, and Internet, I tell you this…IT CANNOT BE DONE — YOU CANNOT DO IT AT THE SAME TIME.  But, somehow, through my panic and reading the medicine information sheet that the pharmacy gives you, but we throw away as soon as we get home (YES YOU DO, DON’T YOU LIE) he was able to play doctor and conclude that I needed medical assistance FAST (it’s what the paper said).

ER here we come.

And let me tell you it takes about 12 minutes from our house to the nearest Hospital ER. But let me assure you folks, those 12 minutes in pain-time equal 10,000 years.

By the time we arrived I was totally out of my mind with pain, scare and about to loose my shit and pass out, because I knew that I wanted to be in total denial at the point of death.

Fortunately, Tom had things under control while people continue to ask me questions and totally ignore the fact that a) HELLO I CANNOT BREATHE and b) I WANTED MY MOMMY BECAUSE I WAS GOING TO DIE!

The next couple of hours, all  I remember was bits and pieces. I was given stuff, which I promptly threw up, I was poked, probed and told to relax and to swallow more stuff, which I proptly keep hurling it right back at them.  They may the decision to insert an IV, which followed with dosages of wonderful narcotics, which relaxed me enough to rejoin the living, in an anesthetized coma.

Which was fine with me.

During all this drama, Tom held his own, answered questions about my medical health (who knew the boy was paying attention all this time?) called my mother and was able to stay calm enough to avoid having another crazy female to deal with and held my hand and told me it was going to be ok, and that they did not see my underwear.

I could not have loved that man more than right there and then.

After all is said and done, we learned to put this in under my already expanding medical history – I’m officially allergic to codeine, which was the culprit of this long saga.

But I also learn one important thing: Tom totally ROCKS IT when it comes to the emergency department.

And if you are still reading this, Holy shit, I think you earned a prize.